sexual communication: you like it how?

Perhaps it is because our country is descended from the
Puritans or maybe, as a society in general, despite our
love of sexual images and innuendos, we are just predisposed
to be anti-sex. Our country has an innate ability to display
sexually suggestive images, make sexually charged comments,
and have a billion dollar porn industry yet when it actually
comes to having sex and having proper sexual communication
with our partners we turn a cold shoulder.


We teach our children abstinence instead of educating
them properly on safe sex and experimentation and in most
households sex is a hush-hush act that is done but never
discussed upon. Why are we depriving ourselves from having
orgasmic sex each and every time? Why do we possess this
inability to openly discuss sex and our sexual preferences?



Sure, we'll blog about it and post comments regarding
sex and our forbidden fantasies but how many of us know the
best and quickest way to arouse our partner? Have you ever
asked?


With individuals increasing their number of sex partners,
we are also increasing the ideal vision that these new partners
will simply, and magically, blow our mind right out of the
gate without ever discussing each of our preferences.
The little sexual intricacies of where you like to be touched
most and how. What type of kissing style you prefer? Whether
you prefer fucking to lovemaking or doggystyle to missionary.
And with all these unasked questions floating around in
the air, how many of us continue to lie there time after time
thinking 'well that feels good, but I'd rather
having him doing that amazing thing with his tongue again?'



Are you tired of the monotonous repetition of sexual activities
in you and your partners arsenal? Tired of the same kissing
and touching mechanics that have become a chore rather
than an adventure?


What do you know about your partner? Do you know their favorite
way to be kissed, favorite sexual position, favorite place
to be massaged, and know when they prefer simply cuddling
to having intensely staggering orgasms?


If you don't already know your partners sexual preferences,
try opening the lines of sexual communication. Open communication
is an essential ingredient for a great sex life as it builds
on the initial chemistry of attraction.


Make simple seductive remarks to your partner to get their
blood boiling. Remarks such as 'you're so big
/ strong, ' 'your skin is like silk, " and
'I love the way your naked body looks next to mine'
are sure to get their flame burning. Complimenting your
lover with sexually and seductively charged comments
will definitely set the right mood.


Continue your communication during sex with phrases such
as 'can you touch me here, ' 'how does that
feel, ' and 'do you like this pace.' These
are great ways to express your preferences and are sure
to keep things heated up, especially if said with a sultry
tone of voice.


Other ways to explore your partners likes and dislikes
are by playing short sexual adventure games. For example,
you could try your hand at the Moan-Groan game which allows
the recipient to express their like or dislike through
noise. For five minutes have your partner touch you in different
methods and places all the while you will respond to each
stimulated touch by a moan or groan that increases in intensity
with how much pleasure you are receiving. If you dislike
something they are doing, respond with a completely different
sound such as 'mooing' like a cow.


Another game is the Movement Game. This is very similar
to the above mentioned game but you will use movement to
express your preferences. If you enjoy where and how they
are touching move your body towards it or touch them with
another part of your body. If you do not like how they are
touching you, simply move your body in the opposite direction.



Lastly, Verbal Cues uses words verbally to distinguish
preferences. This is a great way to learn how to communicate
verbally with your partner. Here you tell your partner
exactly how you would like to be touched by him/her and why
that type of touch is desirable to you. Try to be as specific
as possible.


Keep the sexual flames burning afterwards by discussing
with your partner what you found to be really pleasurable
and what you hope for the next time around. Make sure to compliment
your partner on things they did exceptionally well as it
will increase the chances of it happening again.


Take the time to learn about how you and your partner can
increase the sexual chemistry. Remember, each person
gets aroused differently, each person orgasms from different
techniques, and each person has different ways that they
enjoy being touched so don't be afraid to ask. The worst
that it will do is make you a better lover.